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Cows Corner
Cows Corner is your go-to destination for unique, sports-inspired apparel and accessories, blending humour, passion, and a love for various games. Whether you’re a player, fan, or just appreciate a witty take on sports culture, our collection of premium-quality T-shirts, hoodies, and accessories is designed to stand out. With bold designs, funny slogans, and a deep connection to the sport.
This hoodie is a back-of-the-net winner for those who live and breathe football and love a bit of cheeky sideline banter. With the hilarious slogan “Your Defence Is Weaker Than My Grandma’s Wifi” splashed across the front, it’s the perfect blend of football humour and bold personality.
Whether you’re watching the match, down the pub, or just causing mischief in five-a-side, this hoodie talks before you even kick a ball.
Made for comfort, warmth and guaranteed laughs, this black hoodie is available in sizes M, L, 2XL, 3XL and 4XL – because let’s face it, everyone deserves to take the mick in style.
Product Features
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Premium black hoodie with bold, funny football quote
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Soft, cosy inner lining – ideal for match days and cold evenings
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Generously sized fit for added comfort (sizes M to 4XL)
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Ribbed cuffs and hem for a classic, relaxed feel
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Machine washable – because even banter needs a clean slate
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Designed and printed in the UK
Perfect For
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Football fans who don’t take themselves too seriously
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Mates who live for a bit of dressing room-style banter
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Pub-goers on match day
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Sunday league legends and five-a-side chatterboxes
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A brilliant gift for the footy mad friend in your life
Go on – give ‘em something to read while they’re picking the ball out of the net.
Stock won’t last forever – grab yours now and score a laugh!
Cows Corner Product Specifications
Cows Corner T-shirt specification.
Manufacturer code |
AT001J |
Commodity Code |
6109100010 |
Country of origin |
Bangladesh |
Material |
Heather grey 90% cotton/10% viscose. |
Colour |
Colour representation is only as accurate as the web design process allows. |
*Product specifications may vary depending on stock levels and availability. An identical alternative will fulfil the order if the above product is unavailable.
Domestic Shipping
UK delivery is £4.99 per order and free with a minimum spend of £50
Shipment processing time
All orders are processed within 1-2 business days, depending on the time of the year. Orders are not shipped or delivered on weekends or holidays.
If we are experiencing a high volume of orders, shipments may be delayed by a few days. Please allow additional days in transit for delivery. If there is a significant delay in the shipment of your order, we will contact you via email or telephone.
Shipping rates & delivery estimates
Shipping charges for your order will be calculated and displayed at checkout.
Shipment method |
Estimated delivery time |
EVRi/DPD/DHL |
2-4 business days |
Delivery delays can occasionally occur.
Shipment confirmation & Order tracking
You will receive a Shipment Confirmation email once your order contains your tracking number(s). The tracking number will be active within 24 hours.
International Shipping Policy
International shipping costs
Europe - £19.95 per order
The rest of the world - £24.95 per order
Shipment processing time
All orders are processed within 1-2 business days. Orders are not shipped or delivered on weekends or holidays.
If we are experiencing a high volume of orders, shipments may be delayed by a few days. Please allow additional days in transit for delivery. If there is a significant delay in the shipment of your order, we will contact you via email or telephone.
Shipping rates & delivery estimates
Shipping charges for your order will be calculated and displayed at checkout.
Shipment method |
Estimated delivery time |
DHL Express |
EU 3-5 business days |
Delivery delays can occasionally occur.
Shipment confirmation & Order tracking
You will receive a Shipment Confirmation email once your order contains your tracking number(s). The tracking number will be active within 24 hours.
Customs, Duties and Taxes
Cows Corner is not responsible for customs and taxes on your order. The customer is responsible for all fees imposed during or after shipping tariffs, taxes, etc.).
Damages
TRG Digital Ltd is not liable for damaged or lost products during shipping. If you received your damaged order, don't hesitate to contact the shipment carrier to file a claim.
Please save all packaging materials and damaged goods before filing a claim.
Your Defence Is Weaker Than My Grandma’s Wifi FAQs
What makes this football hoodie a great gift?

What makes this football hoodie a great gift?
This hoodie is the perfect mix of humour and comfort, making it an ideal gift for football lovers who enjoy a bit of banter. Whether it’s for a birthday, Christmas, or a cheeky surprise for a mate, it’s guaranteed to get a laugh and plenty of wear.
Who would enjoy this hoodie the most?

Who would enjoy this hoodie the most?
It’s perfect for anyone who’s football-mad and doesn’t shy away from a joke. Think Sunday league players, pub football pundits, or that one mate who’s always got something cheeky to say on match day.
Is this hoodie only for men?

Is this hoodie only for men?
Not at all! While the sizes run from M to 4XL, it’s a unisex fit, so it’s great for anyone who loves football and banter, regardless of gender.
What occasions is this hoodie suitable for?

What occasions is this hoodie suitable for?
It’s spot-on for gifting during birthdays, Christmas, Secret Santa, and even end-of-season team dos. It’s also a brilliant ‘just because’ gift for footy mates who love a laugh.
Will the print last after washing?

Will the print last after washing?
Yes, the slogan is printed using high-quality, long-lasting techniques to ensure it holds up match after match, wash after wash. Just follow the care instructions to keep it looking top-notch.
Funny Football Hoodie – “Your Defence Is Weaker Than My Grandma’s Wifi”
Inject some serious humour into your match-day outfit with this bold and brilliantly cheeky football hoodie. Featuring the hilarious slogan “Your Defence Is Weaker Than My Grandma’s Wifi”, this black hoodie is perfect for football fans who love a bit of banter as much as they love the beautiful game.
Made for comfort, built for laughs, and designed to turn heads wherever you go, whether it’s in the stands, on the sidelines or down the local pub.
This is more than just a hoodie. It’s a statement.
🔥 Who’s it for?
This hoodie is made for anyone who lives and breathes football, but doesn’t take themselves too seriously. Whether you’re the joker of your five-a-side team, the mate who always dishes out the banter, or simply someone who enjoys a good laugh at half-time, this one’s for you.
It’s available in sizes M, L, 2XL, 3XL and 4XL, with a relaxed fit that makes it ideal for layering on chilly match days or lounging at home while watching the game on telly.
🎁 Perfect gift for:
- ⚽ Birthdays for football-mad friends or family
- 🎄 Christmas gifts that score a laugh
- 🎁 Secret Santa with a bit of edge
- 🏆 Sunday league team-mates and coaches
- 🍻 Pub-going mates who never miss a match
- 💬 Banter kings who always have the last word
🧵 Product Features:
- 🖤 Classic black hoodie with bold, eye-catching slogan
- 🧵 Soft, brushed interior for all-day warmth and comfort
- 📏 Sizes from M to 4XL – a comfortable fit for all body types
- 🧼 Easy-care fabric – machine washable and long-lasting
- 🇬🇧 Designed and printed in the UK
Whether you’re treating yourself or buying for a mate, this hoodie is guaranteed to bring a smile, and a few giggles, wherever it’s worn.
Don’t wait until full-time, order yours today and bring a touch of banter to your football wardrobe!

Design Your Own AI Designed Product
products | ai designs
Looking for something truly unique? Design your own sports gifts in seconds with our AI tool.
From a cricket hoodie your teen will actually wear to a tennis bottle personalised with Dad’s favourite quote, you can create custom gear that’s as fun and original as they are.
Perfect for sporty kids, proud parents, and anyone who lives and breathes the game.

Personalise Gift Boxes for Special Occasions
products | gift boxes
Want to wow a cricket-mad partner or surprise your rugby-obsessed kid?
Our custom gift boxes turn great presents into unforgettable ones.
Packed with personalised touches and sporty flair, they’re perfect for birthdays, big wins, or just showing you care. It’s the kind of gift that feels made just for them, because it is.

Funny Sports Hoodies
products | hoodies
Stay warm, look sharp, and get the laughs.
Our rugby hoodies aren’t just cosy, they’re conversation starters.
Whether you're on the sidelines at school cricket or heading out for a chilly Sunday golf round, these hoodies bring comfort and character.
Designed for adults but loved by sporty kids too, they’re the perfect fit for fans who like their style with a side of humour

Funny Sports Mugs
products | mugs
Morning brews just got a sporting upgrade.
Whether it’s cricket chat, rugby rants, or golf grumbles, our mugs are made for fans who like their tea with a side of banter.
Designed with grown-ups in mind (and safely out of reach from little hands), these mugs bring humour to your daily routine, one sip at a time

T-shirt With a Smile
product | t-shirt
From cricket-loving dads to tennis-mad mums, and everyone who appreciates a cheeky football pun, our funny sports T-shirts bring the laughs wherever you go.
With bold designs and sizes for both grown-ups and kids, they’re made for match days, school runs, and everything in between.
Sport your sense of humour in style, on or off the pitch

Upload Your Own Images to Products
product | own images
Captured a classic football moment? Turn it into something unforgettable.
Upload your favourite photos and create custom T-shirts, mugs, bottles and more, ideal for gifting to proud parents, teammates, or young players who’ll wear it with pride.
It’s your memory, your way, made into a one-of-a-kind keepsake they’ll never forget

Funny Sports Baby Grows
product | baby grows
Start their sporting journey in style.
Our funny baby grows are made for the tiniest fans, with playful designs that rugby mums, cricket dads, and proud families can’t get enough of.
Soft, comfy, and full of personality, they’re perfect for showing off your future star, whether they’re snoozing, crawling, or practising their first victory pose

Funny Sports Water Bottles
product | water bottles
Stay hydrated and bring the laughs.
Whether you're coaching the kids’ football squad or serving up aces on court, our funny sports bottles add character to every sip.
Built for match days, gym sessions, and sideline banter, they’re the ultimate blend of function and fun, because your bottle should be as bold as your game.